"Relationship"...be on the ship or just sink it down...

I am not an expert in the 'relationship' subject to be a consultant to anyone. I am also not even a psychologist. I am just a girl who's still learning, adjusting, compromising and communicating in her couple life. So when it became an important issue, all the advice I can give was my experience to share. It doesn't have to be your right answer as it never have the RIGHT answer because relationship is about experiencing with no right or wrong respond. My advice doesn't have to be useful in your opinion, it doesn't have to relate to your situation but at least it came from another human being who had been there and still in the circle of something called 'RELATIONSHIP'.

When I'm in love and when I decided to be in a serious relationship, I totally commit and dedicate to my partner. I'm still independent, of course as I also have friends and family to share my time, but also completely devote to my relationship. If I committed to someone, I ceased the flirting. I also gave up all my lovers. But whenever I started to fly around freely again without any guilt, that's when I suspected a crisis in my what so-called relationship. And when I frequently felt bored or irritated by my partner, that's when I realized I could no longer be with him and no matter how hard I tried, I couldn't lie to my heart. Whenever you feel like you have to try so hard and whenever you feel like it's just only you who's been trying, alone, to keep things alive. That's the time you should reconsider the situation and evaluate if it's worth to keep holding on to.

My previous relationship was a great lesson. I don't want to dig it up but just only to make a sample of what's gone wrong. Some people might not concern about the different of their partner's life style or even some may have a difficulty having the same favorite sport because they like to compete each other. But maybe sometime having nothing in common at all could be a major drama. By the time we noticed, the crack between him and I were to big to heal. Also when the communication failed, the relationship collapse. We failed in terms of communication and we also failed in terms of showing the affection. I won't blame anyone but myself for being so blind because of love. When the love's gone, the truth's appeared. That part of my failure couple life was over now and life starts again.

One thing that I can tell you, please don't be in relationship just because you like the idea of it but be in relationship because you love the person and you wanna be with them. I've never been wrong on that. You shouldn't fool around with somebody's feeling nor your own. Relationship isn't a shelter for your loneliness. As someday when you realize the shelter doesn't suit you anymore and eventually you leave. You take advantage of that shelter and leave it shatters just because you find it unbearable to live in. Please don't. Safe yourself an energy and somebody else a time.

You don't have to base your decision on my story. Everyone has their own reason and each of us has our own story to base on. I don't have any good advice but enjoy life. Don't do things because you suppose to or because everyone thinks it's good for you, do because you want to and because you're happy with the choice you've made. Those people doesn't live your life so they don't really know exactly what will be good for you. Make your own choice, live your own life.

I can't say that my life is perfect right now but I am happy enough with my new love that I won't ask anything more. For those who keeps asking when I'm gonna get married and when I'm gonna have baby. I will let you know when the time comes.

Live & Love

Yosita Anita V. s

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